Contributor

July 15 2021

Highly Qualified

Kayleigh D'abadie Blog, Contributor, new

[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ custom_padding_last_edited=”on|tablet” _builder_version=”4.7.4″ _module_preset=”default” custom_margin_tablet=”0px||||false|false” custom_margin_phone=”-82px||||false|false” custom_margin_last_edited=”on|phone” custom_padding=”||12px|||” custom_padding_tablet=”0px||||false|false” custom_padding_phone=”0px||||false|false”][et_pb_row custom_padding_last_edited=”on|phone” _builder_version=”4.6.0″ _module_preset=”default” custom_padding=”0px|||||” custom_padding_tablet=”” custom_padding_phone=”|0px||0px|false|false”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.6.0″ _module_preset=”default”][et_pb_image src=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/HighlyQualified.jpeg” title_text=”June8Blog_Insta” disabled_on=”off|off|on” _builder_version=”4.9.7″ _module_preset=”default” custom_padding=”||8px|||” border_radii=”on|8px|8px|8px|8px” box_shadow_style=”preset1″][/et_pb_image][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.9.7″ _module_preset=”default” text_font=”Neue Montreal||||||||” custom_padding=”||25px|||” hover_enabled=”0″ inline_fonts=”Ogg Medium” sticky_enabled=”0″]You remember that point in your life when you were applying for jobs? Your resume was absolutely perfect (after editing it about one hundred times), and you had at least three letters of recommendation rolling in. The day of anticipation finally approached; you dressed in your Sunday best and walked into the interview with confidence (as well as a dash of fear). But one thing was for certain; you were qualified and had all of the things to prove that fact.

I think one of the greatest questions we can ask ourselves in this life is, “Where is my worth found?” I know that you and I are extremely valuable people, but where exactly is that value determined? We live in a world that is constantly asking us to find new levels of personal achievement: “What can I add to my resume?”; “How can I become more appealing?”; “How can I be better?”; “How can I improve my worth?”

Having a healthy balance of reflection and improvement in our personal lives is excellent; it helps encourage us to live our lives with self-accountability and pushes us towards growth. But what happens when the striving turns into stress? Does your worth start to feel like it stems from personal achievements? Sometimes we can feel like our worth is destined to solely lean on the product of our own actions. This puts a heavy weight on our shoulders making us think that we are required to live a life constantly needing to earn another “golden star” or climb to a higher tier of qualification.

When your worth feels disconnected or lost, remember that you were worth the cost of death on a cross. Jesus did that for you.

In 2 Corinthians chapter 3, Paul the Apostle was speaking to the church in Corinth teaching of the Great News of the New Covenant, unveiling the truth that because of Jesus, there was (and is) no longer a need to continue striving for the impossible goal of perfection.

“We are confident of all this because of our great trust in God through Christ. It is not that we think we are qualified to do anything on our own. Our qualification comes from God.” – 2 Corinthians 3:4-5

When you feel unqualified, remember that your qualification comes from God. When your worth feels disconnected or lost, remember that you were worth the cost of death on a cross. Jesus did that for you. Your worth, your value, is not identified by the product of what you do, how others see you, or even how you see yourself – but it is determined by how the Creator of the universe identifies you. He calls you beloved, child, whole, free, forgiven. You are all those things and more – so be encouraged friend, lift off the weight of striving, and sit in the lightness of liberty.

“For the Lord is the Spirit, and wherever the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, who with unveiled faces reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.” – 2 Corinthians 3:17-18[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.6.0″ _module_preset=”default” width_tablet=”80%” width_phone=”80%” width_last_edited=”on|tablet” max_width=”1920px” module_alignment=”center” locked=”off”][et_pb_row custom_padding_last_edited=”on|phone” _builder_version=”4.7.4″ background_color=”#ffffff” width=”100%” max_width=”1920px” custom_margin=”0px|0px|0px|0px|true|true” custom_padding=”51px|60px|51px|60px|true|true” custom_padding_tablet=”60px|40px|60px|40px|true|true” custom_padding_phone=”40px|20px|40px|20px|true|true” border_radii=”on|10px|10px|10px|10px” box_shadow_style=”preset1″ box_shadow_color=”rgba(0,0,0,0.1)” locked=”off”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.0.3″][et_pb_blurb title=”@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF9hdXRob3IiLCJzZXR0aW5ncyI6eyJiZWZvcmUiOiJCeSAiLCJhZnRlciI6IiIsIm5hbWVfZm9ybWF0IjoiZGlzcGxheV9uYW1lIiwibGluayI6Im9mZiIsImxpbmtfZGVzdGluYXRpb24iOiJhdXRob3JfYXJjaGl2ZSJ9fQ==@” image=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/Kayleigh-scaled.jpg” image_max_width=”150px” content_max_width=”860px” image_tablet=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/joshbairdblog.png” image_phone=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/ShawnBaird2.png” image_last_edited=”off|tablet” image_max_width_tablet=”150px” image_max_width_phone=”150px” image_max_width_last_edited=”on|tablet” _builder_version=”4.9.7″ _dynamic_attributes=”title,content” header_font=”New Montreal Medium|600|||||||” header_text_color=”#333333″ header_font_size=”22px” header_line_height=”1.4em” body_font=”Neue Montreal||||||||” body_font_size=”16px” body_line_height=”1.9em” text_orientation=”center” animation=”off” header_font_size_tablet=”18px” header_font_size_phone=”17px” header_font_size_last_edited=”on|desktop” body_font_size_tablet=”15px” body_font_size_phone=”17px” body_font_size_last_edited=”on|desktop” custom_css_main_element=”font-weight: 400;” border_radii_image=”on|200px|200px|200px|200px” box_shadow_style_image=”preset1″ box_shadow_vertical_image=”10px” box_shadow_blur_image=”20px” box_shadow_color_image=”rgba(0,0,0,0.1)”]@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF9hdXRob3JfYmlvIiwic2V0dGluZ3MiOnsiYmVmb3JlIjoiIiwiYWZ0ZXIiOiIifX0=@[/et_pb_blurb][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]

June 24 2021

From God’s Vantage Point

Suzanne Odum Blog, Contributor, new

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As my sisters and I started getting older, my family began a new Christmas tradition. Since we were no longer children, we decided that instead of each of us buying every family member a big-item, super expensive gift, we would each draw one name from a hat and would go above and beyond for that one member of the family and buy nice, but smaller, less expensive gifts for everyone else. That way everyone would receive an over-the-top exciting gift and lots of other little presents to enjoy.

I remember one particular year I drew my dad’s name. So, as the tradition went, that Christmas I would get my dad an expensive, special, surprise gift. I was so excited and immediately started planning what his gift would be! Now, this was back when the Total Gym was first released onto the market. Remember the Chuck Norris and Christy Brinkley infomercials promoting the exciting, easy to use home gym? You also need to remember that when the Total Gym first came out, it was a very expensive piece of equipment. So, I thought, yes…this is it; this is what I’ll get my dad!

Jump forward to Christmas day that year. I had the family all gather in the living room. I made everyone close their eyes as I hauled out (as quietly as I could), this BIG surprise gift for my dad. Being one who is always a little bit “extra,” I decided to do a demo on the equipment to help get my dad excited at its potential and how fun working out on the machine would be for him. So, I raised the roller bench to the highest level, sat on my knees tilted downwards, and pulled the resistance straps with my hands behind my back. I was now positioned to duplicate what I’d seen on TV. Then I proudly announced, “Dad, this is how you do it.” A couple seconds later as I lay on the floor after face-planting into the carpet, wrapped tightly in the straps with my body twisted into a pretzel upside down, my dad calmly said, “I don’t think I want to try that.”

Well, as is with most exercise equipment, his gift took its place sitting in a corner with clothes and clutter piled up on it. I can’t help but wonder if my demonstration had something to do with that.

I mention that story to illustrate how often my own understanding has failed me. I had the equipment, I had the infomercial, but not once did I look at or through the directions. Basically, I didn’t know what I was doing, and that clearly showed.

I’m certain we don’t intentionally set out to resist or defy submitting to God in every area of our lives. We want to trust Him, but sometimes our loss of control can make us feel anxious or even fearful.

The Bible says in Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.”

If you’re like me, you want to live out those Scriptures. I’m certain we don’t intentionally set out to resist or defy submitting to God in every area of our lives. We want to trust Him, but sometimes our loss of control can make us feel anxious or even fearful.

Now imagine being in a skyscraper and looking down on the traffic below. From that viewpoint, it’s easy to see every obstacle facing the drivers below, and in that position those obstacles can be seen for blocks. It’s from that vantage point that God sees us as He is directing our lives. The road that may seem best at our limited vantage point, may be one God wants us to avoid for reasons He alone can see.

“Submission” means to accept and yield to the will or authority of another. Add to that “trust,” which means having a firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability or strength of someone or something.

At times, if I’m honest, I have put more trust in my GPS to get me to a destination, than I put in God to direct my path. I enter the destination and follow every detour and every reroute without question.

Here is what God promises: if we put our trust in Him and submit to His will, He will make our paths straight. The Hebrew word for make straight is yashar, a verb meaning to make smooth. What that literally means is that God will cut a straight road through difficult terrain and make a straight path.

I think we can all agree that this is a promise we want operating in our lives – learning to trust and submit fully to God will allow us to see this promise fulfilled.

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June 15 2021

Dad Knows Best

Pastor Shawn Baird Blog, Contributor, new Father's Day, Fatherhood

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“I want to go home,” my son, Jax, told me, tears streaming down his face, his favorite Caps shirt torn, slightly bruised body, slightly more bruised ego.

Last year while on his first trip to the new bike park nearby, he’d just fallen off one of the ramps. While he wasn’t hurt all that bad physically, one of his handlebars had ripped through his Caps Stanley Cup Champions shirt. He came over to me and asked if we could go home. I said, “Yes, but after you get back on your bike and ride over that ramp.” I knew he wasn’t physically injured, just banged up a bit. But I also knew that if he left like that, defeated, it’d be really hard to come back the next time. I looked him in the eye and told him, “You can do this! Now go kick that ramp’s butt.”

And then something quite amazing happened. My son, who hadn’t traditionally been a risk taker, wheeled his bike to the top of the hill and tried again. On the first attempt, he made it over the first of two humps but had to ride off of the bottom of the dip prior to ascending the second on this obstacle. He wasn’t lined up right and it was a near disaster. But he started again and rode up and over and across the entirety of the ramp. Success!

He would go on to do a few more of the ramps there before we called it a day.

I think that one of the best gifts that we as fathers can give their children is the gift of perspective.

I think that one of the best gifts that we as fathers can give their children is the gift of perspective. Us dads may not know everything (though we may try to act like it sometimes), but we do have a vantage point that our kids don’t. By way of age and experience, we can see and understand commonly faced obstacles that our sons and daughters are facing for the first time. As their continuous observers and cheerleaders, we know our children intimately – perhaps even better than they know themselves sometimes. And most of the time, we know the general direction they should take in life before they do. This sort of perspective is invaluable, even if our kids don’t appreciate it at the moment (did you?!).

This same perspective is what our Heavenly Father offers us, only He knows us, our circumstances, and our future infinitely more than we can even imagine. In Psalm 139, the Psalmist wrote, “O LORD, you have searched me and known me! You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O LORD, you know it altogether. You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it.”- Psalms 139:1-6 (ESV)

In life it’s inevitable that we will fall, bruise our bodies, hurt our pride, and maybe tear our favorite Caps shirt, but the question is, do we have the guts to get back up, go back to the top of the hill, and try again? I know one thing: it is certainly easier to do when we have a dad in our life who will give us some perspective and encouragement along the way. That’s what your Heavenly Father wants to do in your life, just the way us Earthly fathers want to do for our own children. My prayer for myself and all of the dads out there is that we will learn to listen to our Heavenly Father’s voice and take his guidance and encouragement to heart just as we try to provide the same for our own children.

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June 10 2021

Who’s Gonna Tell Them?

Bryant Stokes Blog, christian, Contributor, new

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Growing up, Juneteenth wasn’t something that my family and I readily celebrated. In all honesty, I think we were ignorant to a pretty significant fact in American History, more specifically African American History. After President Abraham Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation (1863) freeing slaves, there was still a portion of slaves in the Confederate South who had not yet received word but, even if they had, wouldn’t have been legally able to apply such proclamation to their lives. It wasn’t until after the Union won the Civil War (1865) did this proclamation apply, legally, to EVERY slave. This proclamation no doubt held in its sub-text very strong socio-economic implications for the Confederacy at that time and the enforcement of that proclamation would have only come from the Union army. Imagine the tension, as word and enforcement finally made it to Texas.

From the mouth of General Gordon Granger on June 19, 1865, came to those slaves probably one of the most life changing moments. The proclamation they had been longing for. The legal separation from racially and economically motivated violent oppression. While those slave states which made up the confederacy held on to their principles for more than a hundred years after this proclamation, its historical significance is what we celebrate.

In observance of Juneteenth, I applaud those who were bold enough to stand for freedom in the face of adversity. I also recognize the insidious nature of sin to keep people bound. Time plays a huge part in this historical narrative. I see it in the limited but growing authority of President Lincoln, and the lack of submission and slothfulness to that authority by the confederate states. I see it in our current sociopolitical climate. The old saying goes: “Time heals all wounds.” To that I add, “Time also reveals all wounds.” As we progress, it becomes important that we observe our history so that we don’t repeat the same mistakes.

Time has taught me this. Restoration begins with equality. You cannot restore what you think less of. The cross levels the playing field for all people.

Time has taught me this. Restoration begins with equality. You cannot restore what you think less of. The cross levels the playing field for ALL PEOPLE. While we are equal at the foot of the cross, the process of working out that freedom will be relative to the person. Jesus came from heaven and put on human form to identify with humanity. Then, set us free by living a perfect life. Then, dying on the cross and being raised from dead with power over sin and death. His plan for all humanity all along was to restore us back to God. He accomplished that plan from the inside out. Similarly, the Emancipation began the tedious work of restoring humanity to African Americans.

Now, take a deep breath because I’m coming down your lane.

“When we were utterly helpless, Christ came at just the right time and died for us sinners. Now, most people would not be willing to die for an upright person, though someone might perhaps be willing to die for a person who is especially good. But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. And since we have been made right in God’s sight by the blood of Christ, he will certainly save us from God’s condemnation.” – Romans 5:6-9

As I was thinking about Juneteenth, our ignorance of it, and the correlation to power of the gospel, I kept coming back to this question: Why didn’t someone tell me earlier?

Here we are some 2000 years after the cross. After precedent and legislation in heaven has been set by the blood of Jesus to free us from sin, and there are some who are still ignorant to the violent oppression and bondage of sin. We, my Christian brothers and sisters, have people in our community who are still ignorant to the power of the gospel, simply because YOU haven’t told them. For what? I think we’ve lost the fervor and boldness to share the gospel because we have become too comfortable and are concerned with our own freedom. Too comfortable. Too comfortable with occasionally posting a scripture on social media as a means of evangelism. Too comfortable with the pastor being the one who wins souls. Too comfortable with criticizing our churches but not investing time or money in the success of it. Snap out of it saints, that comfort is making you lazy. You, having been made free, have an accountability to this freedom declaration.

According to Matthew 28, Jesus commanded the eleven disciples to now “go and make” disciples. This is what should encourage you. As stated by Roger Connor in his book, General Gordon Granger, General Granger was known for, “his strict attention to all the details of making a well-disciplined body of soldiers out of a mass of awkward men from every walk of life.” This well-disciplined man, although not infamous in comparison, was the man that carried a message that generationally changed lives. General Granger is now celebrated for his seemingly mundane execution of his duties.

Isaiah 61:1 says it like this: “The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is upon me, for the LORD has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted and to proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed.”

Now we, like the disciples, have the opportunity having been taught the faith to carry this life changing message of emancipation to the oppressed because we’ve been equipped for it!

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June 2 2021

He Knows: A Graduation Blog

Pastor Jenny Baird Blog, Contributor, new graduation

Congratulations Class of 2021! Graduating from high school or higher education is always a huge achievement! This year you have not only completed your coursework, but you have done so in spite of incredible obstacles both externally and internally. Take a deep breath. You made it. You are stronger than you know. You can do hard things. We are SO proud of you!

As you prepare to close this chapter and step into the next one, I want to encourage you that God not only knows where you are coming from, but He knows where you are going, and He knows how to get you there.

At times of transition or uncertainty in my own life, I have found so much comfort and confidence in recognizing that I have a Good Shepherd who is committed to leading me, providing for me, protecting me and even blessing me. I am not alone, and neither are you!

Psalm 23
The Lord is my shepherd;
I have all that I need.
²He lets me rest in green meadows;
he leads me beside peaceful streams.
³ He renews my strength.
He guides me along right paths,
bringing honor to his name.
⁴Even when I walk
through the darkest valley,^[^a^]
I will not be afraid,
for you are close beside me.
Your rod and your staff
protect and comfort me.
⁵You prepare a feast for me
in the presence of my enemies.
You honor me by anointing my head with oil.
My cup overflows with blessings.
⁶Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me
all the days of my life,
and I will live in the house of the Lord
forever.

He knows where you are coming from.

Ps. 23: 2-3 tells us that the Good Shepherd gives us rest, renews our strength and guides us along right paths. Some translations say, “He restores my soul.” How is your soul doing? How has this year been uniquely challenging for you? What have you lost? Where have you drifted from God’s best? There may be some things from this past season that you need to grieve. Give yourself the space to do that and then choose to move forward as God guides you along the right path.

Having faith in God is not just trusting the promise that He has a plan – but putting all of our trust in the ONE who has the plan.

He knows where you are going.

You may have your life planned out or you may be staring blankly into the future wondering what is next. The good news is God has a plan!

For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. ¹²In those days when you pray, I will listen. ¹³If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. ¹⁴I will be found by you,” says the Lord. Jeremiah 29:11-14

Of course, we have to use this passage in a graduation encouragement! Having faith in God is not just trusting the promise that He has a plan – but putting all of our trust in the ONE who has the plan. We can trust that not only does God have a good plan for our lives, but that He WANTS to lead us in it.

Whether you have a good idea of what is next, or you’re still trying to figure that out, take this opportunity to look for God with your whole heart. He promises you will find Him! And when you have the Promiser, you get all of the promises!

He knows how to get you there.

“Within your heart you can make plans for your future, but the Lord chooses the steps you take to get there.” Proverbs 16:9 TPT

I love this Scripture because it shows us that we have a part to play, and God has a part to play in fulfilling the plans He has for us.

Our part is to make plans. We can’t just sit around waiting for something to happen. We should be diligent and do our best to prepare, knock on doors, and make the most of the opportunities in front of us.

God’s part is to direct our steps. It is easier to steer a moving vehicle than one that is still! As we step out in faith, we can trust that God will open doors and shut doors. When the road gets bumpy or takes a turn we didn’t see coming, we can trust that God is good and finishes what He starts.

“He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it.” I Thessalonians 5:24 ESV

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May 25 2021

An Abundance of Kindness for an Abundance of Controversy

Melanie Ramirez Blog, Contributor, new kindness

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“I’ve got to stop using my husband as my illustrations,” I thought to myself immediately before I used my husband as my illustration.

He recently had a birthday and is one of those people that says they want nothing for their birthday, nor do they want to do anything for their birthday. For me, that was a hard pill to swallow because I know he actually meant it. I’m just one of those people that feels wrong for not celebrating in some way, shape, or form something that I feel should be celebrated. But that’s the point: celebrating because I wanted to when he didn’t would have defeated the entire purpose of celebrating his birthday.

We can love our people as much as we want but if we’re only loving them the way we want to then we’re still just loving ourselves more.

We can love our people as much as we want but if we’re only loving them the way we want to then we’re still just loving ourselves more. In Philippians 2:3-4, Paul says, “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.” Are we respecting their choices? Are we honoring their opinions even if we disagree? Are we making them feel judged if we disagree? Learn to see your thoughts and conversations through the lens of, “Am I reflecting Jesus?” Jesus put it simply in John 15:17, “This is my command: Love each other.” I would argue that to be a reflection of Jesus is to be a reflection of love, and to love well is to take an interest in others.

I would have never known how to best celebrate my husband’s birthday if I hadn’t asked him. Paul tells us to, “Take an interest in others too.” Talk to people; take an interest in their lives; let these conversations shift your perspective from yourself. Ask them how their week is going and actually listen to their answers. One of the largest sources of division in the world in the last year has been a lack of empathy and understanding for the people around us. Listen to why people are concerned about wearing or not wearing masks. Listen to why people care as much as they do about racial issues. Kindness is too often speculated for coming with an ulterior motive; genuine kindness shouldn’t be that rare. Be generous with your time to hear and empathize with people’s emotions around every controversial topic that comes up. In a time with no lack of controversy, there shouldn’t be a lack of kindness either.

This same principle can be applied to our relationships with Jesus, in order to love Him, make sure that you know Him. Read your Bible and spend some time with Him; get to know Him. Jesus already put us all above Him when He died on the cross and knowing Him more will further fuel our hearts to reflect His love to everyone around us.

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May 20 2021

Don’t Drink The Poison

Hannah Arensen Blog, Contributor, new forgiveness

[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ custom_padding_last_edited=”on|tablet” _builder_version=”4.7.4″ _module_preset=”default” custom_margin_tablet=”0px||||false|false” custom_margin_phone=”-82px||||false|false” custom_margin_last_edited=”on|phone” custom_padding=”||12px|||” custom_padding_tablet=”0px||||false|false” custom_padding_phone=”0px||||false|false”][et_pb_row custom_padding_last_edited=”on|phone” _builder_version=”4.6.0″ _module_preset=”default” custom_padding=”0px|||||” custom_padding_tablet=”” custom_padding_phone=”|0px||0px|false|false”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.6.0″ _module_preset=”default”][et_pb_image src=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/Poison.jpeg” title_text=”Hydrate” disabled_on=”off|off|on” _builder_version=”4.9.4″ _module_preset=”default” custom_padding=”||8px|||” border_radii=”on|8px|8px|8px|8px” box_shadow_style=”preset1″][/et_pb_image][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.9.4″ _module_preset=”default” text_font=”Neue Montreal||||||||” custom_padding=”||25px|||” inline_fonts=”Ogg Medium”]I am the youngest of three kids, and I can honestly say that my siblings are my best friends. They are both incredible people, and they pursue the Lord with all their heart; I can’t imagine my life without their wisdom, their silliness, and their friendship. But growing up, we fought CONSTANTLY. I’m talking non-stop bickering, yelling, crying, and all kinds of maliciousness that comes with the territory of having siblings.

I’ll never forget storming up to my room after a fight with Josiah. I was fuming on the top bunk when I heard my mother having a little discussion with him downstairs. Soon enough he came up, opened the bedroom door, looked at the wall and said, “I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?”

I looked right at him and yelled, “NO!”

The immediate reaction from him was to yell downstairs and say, “Mooooooommmmm, she didn’t forgiiiivvveee meeeee.”

I yelled after him, “Because he didn’t mean it! He was just saying those things because you told him to.”

What she said next is something I will never forget. She got right down on my level, and she said, very firmly:

“Hannah, it doesn’t matter whether he means it or not, forgiveness is a NON-NEGOTIABLE.”

“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, iforgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” – Ephesians 4:32

It’s non-negotiable. It’s a command from God. In that moment, I realized that forgiveness isn’t a feeling; it’s a decision. Forgiveness does not mean there will be reconciliation; I had to forgive my brother whether he was sorry or not.

Forgiveness isn’t a feeling; it’s a decision. Forgiveness does not mean there will be reconciliation; I had to forgive whether he was sorry or not.

The problem is, sometimes we don’t want to forgive. Sometimes people do awful things – whether on purpose or totally unbeknownst to them they hurt us – and we don’t want to forgive because somehow we feel that by holding onto that grief and refusing to forgive, we are serving them some semblance of justice. But let me ask this, who are you to dole out justice? Who am I? (Romans 12:19)

As the saying goes, “Unforgiveness is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.” Instead of serving justice to this person or group of people, we end up poisoning our soul with anger and frustration.

When we keep drinking the poison of unforgiveness we begin to live in a state of bitterness. And that feeling of bitterness is much harder to break free from. In Hebrews 12:15, Paul describes it as a root. It creeps up on you when you’re not expecting it. It happens when that person’s name comes up in conversation, and a little pang of frustration or anger hits your heart.

You can recognize bitterness when no matter what a person (or group of people) says or does, you are seeing through the lens of the hurt they’ve caused you. But that isn’t the lens we are called to see people through. We are commanded to forgive as Christ forgave us! Meaning we need to love our enemies, pray for those who persecute us, and bless those who have disappointed us.

This doesn’t mean we’re required to be besties with the people who hurt us, nor does it mean we ignore healthy boundaries. It DOES mean that we need to make the decision to forgive, not just once, but every day. If you still feel that pang in your heart, forgive them again. Take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5). Lay down your pain and your frustration at the foot of the cross, put it at the feet of the one who forgave you.

Set aside some time this week to ask God, “Who do I need to forgive?” You may be surprised.[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.6.0″ _module_preset=”default” width_tablet=”80%” width_phone=”80%” width_last_edited=”on|tablet” max_width=”1920px” module_alignment=”center” locked=”off”][et_pb_row custom_padding_last_edited=”on|phone” _builder_version=”4.7.4″ background_color=”#ffffff” width=”100%” max_width=”1920px” custom_margin=”0px|0px|0px|0px|true|true” custom_padding=”51px|60px|51px|60px|true|true” custom_padding_tablet=”60px|40px|60px|40px|true|true” custom_padding_phone=”40px|20px|40px|20px|true|true” border_radii=”on|10px|10px|10px|10px” box_shadow_style=”preset1″ box_shadow_color=”rgba(0,0,0,0.1)” locked=”off”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.0.3″][et_pb_blurb title=”@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF9hdXRob3IiLCJzZXR0aW5ncyI6eyJiZWZvcmUiOiJCeSAiLCJhZnRlciI6IiIsIm5hbWVfZm9ybWF0IjoiZGlzcGxheV9uYW1lIiwibGluayI6Im9mZiIsImxpbmtfZGVzdGluYXRpb24iOiJhdXRob3JfYXJjaGl2ZSJ9fQ==@” image=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/HannahArenson.png” image_max_width=”150px” content_max_width=”860px” image_tablet=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/joshbairdblog.png” image_phone=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/ShawnBaird2.png” image_last_edited=”off|tablet” image_max_width_tablet=”150px” image_max_width_phone=”150px” image_max_width_last_edited=”on|tablet” _builder_version=”4.9.1″ _dynamic_attributes=”title,content” header_font=”New Montreal Medium|600|||||||” header_text_color=”#333333″ header_font_size=”22px” header_line_height=”1.4em” body_font=”Neue Montreal||||||||” body_font_size=”16px” body_line_height=”1.9em” text_orientation=”center” animation=”off” header_font_size_tablet=”18px” header_font_size_phone=”17px” header_font_size_last_edited=”on|desktop” body_font_size_tablet=”15px” body_font_size_phone=”17px” body_font_size_last_edited=”on|desktop” custom_css_main_element=”font-weight: 400;” border_radii_image=”on|200px|200px|200px|200px” box_shadow_style_image=”preset1″ box_shadow_vertical_image=”10px” box_shadow_blur_image=”20px” box_shadow_color_image=”rgba(0,0,0,0.1)”]@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF9hdXRob3JfYmlvIiwic2V0dGluZ3MiOnsiYmVmb3JlIjoiIiwiYWZ0ZXIiOiIifX0=@[/et_pb_blurb][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]

May 13 2021

God’s Way

Jennifer Eye Blog, Contributor, new Relationships

[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ custom_padding_last_edited=”on|tablet” _builder_version=”4.7.4″ _module_preset=”default” custom_margin_tablet=”0px||||false|false” custom_margin_phone=”-82px||||false|false” custom_margin_last_edited=”on|phone” custom_padding=”||12px|||” custom_padding_tablet=”0px||||false|false” custom_padding_phone=”0px||||false|false”][et_pb_row custom_padding_last_edited=”on|phone” _builder_version=”4.6.0″ _module_preset=”default” custom_padding=”0px|||||” custom_padding_tablet=”” custom_padding_phone=”|0px||0px|false|false”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.6.0″ _module_preset=”default”][et_pb_image src=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/GodsWay2.jpeg” title_text=”Hydrate” disabled_on=”off|off|on” _builder_version=”4.9.1″ _module_preset=”default” custom_padding=”||8px|||” border_radii=”on|8px|8px|8px|8px” box_shadow_style=”preset1″][/et_pb_image][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.9.1″ _module_preset=”default” text_font=”Neue Montreal||||||||” custom_padding=”||25px|||” inline_fonts=”Ogg Medium”]Relationships are hard, but they can also be very rewarding. I have experience when it comes to doing life with others. I am the middle child of three children, come from a very large extended family, have been working in the service industry for over 25 years, run my own business, lead and participate in small groups, serve at the church, have been married for 20 years, and am the mother of three teens. So, believe me when I say relationships are hard, but they are rewarding when done God’s way.

What is God’s way you might ask? I believe that God gives us directions on how to love and operate with those in our lives. Throughout the Bible, we are told multiple times by Jesus that the two greatest Commandments are to love God and to love others. As Christians, we are blessed to have the wisdom of the Bible; it’s our guide to help us live successfully here on earth. God has already told us through the word what we should be doing in our relationships for success, but do we do it? Check it out for yourself:

Husbands– love, submit, and lay down your lives for your wife and do not be bitter towards her

Wives– submit to your husband in everything, and respect your husband

Children– obey and honor your parents

Everyone– be slow to speak, quick to listen, slow to get angry; give, forgive, help, encourage one another, pray, give thanks; and whatever you do, do it with all of your heart, as working for the Lord and not for men.

Jesus obediently did what God told Him to do and laid down His life so that you and I could be in right standing with God. That, to me, is the ultimate expression of love.

Although we have directions on how to do life with others God’s way, we still have the choice on how we are going to respond to and love the people that God has placed in our lives. When I think about love being a choice, I’m reminded of Jesus crying out to the Father in Gethsemane. As He prayed, face down in anguish, “My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from Me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine,” (Matthew 26:39) we see Jesus’s selfless act of surrendering His will to the Father’s. We know that God’s will was for Jesus to die and be the sacrifice for our sins. Jesus obediently did what God told Him to do and laid down His life so that you and I could be in right standing with God. That, to me, is the ultimate expression of love.

Knowing this truth reminds me that I too must sacrifice my own selfish desires, wants, and even needs in order to love the way God wants me to love and treat others. As I choose to do this and follow God’s directions on how to treat others in my life, not only will my relationships improve, but I will now be reflecting the Cross back to Christ saying, “God, not my will be done, but yours in my relationships.” This shows God that I love Him enough to trust Him and His will over my own will and ways. Yes, this is hard to do and even seems unfair, especially when we have been hurt by others. But, I can guarantee you that God is faithful and He is just. You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you.

Just like God resurrected Jesus after the cross, we can trust God to resurrect life, peace, hope, and love in every one of our relationships as we love sacrificially and lay down our selfish ways to do relationships God’s way.[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.6.0″ _module_preset=”default” width_tablet=”80%” width_phone=”80%” width_last_edited=”on|tablet” max_width=”1920px” module_alignment=”center” locked=”off”][et_pb_row custom_padding_last_edited=”on|phone” _builder_version=”4.7.4″ background_color=”#ffffff” width=”100%” max_width=”1920px” custom_margin=”0px|0px|0px|0px|true|true” custom_padding=”51px|60px|51px|60px|true|true” custom_padding_tablet=”60px|40px|60px|40px|true|true” custom_padding_phone=”40px|20px|40px|20px|true|true” border_radii=”on|10px|10px|10px|10px” box_shadow_style=”preset1″ box_shadow_color=”rgba(0,0,0,0.1)” locked=”off”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.0.3″][et_pb_blurb title=”@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF9hdXRob3IiLCJzZXR0aW5ncyI6eyJiZWZvcmUiOiJCeSAiLCJhZnRlciI6IiIsIm5hbWVfZm9ybWF0IjoiZGlzcGxheV9uYW1lIiwibGluayI6Im9mZiIsImxpbmtfZGVzdGluYXRpb24iOiJhdXRob3JfYXJjaGl2ZSJ9fQ==@” image=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/05/JenniferEyeAuthor.jpg” image_max_width=”150px” content_max_width=”860px” image_tablet=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/joshbairdblog.png” image_phone=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/ShawnBaird2.png” image_last_edited=”off|tablet” image_max_width_tablet=”150px” image_max_width_phone=”150px” image_max_width_last_edited=”on|tablet” _builder_version=”4.9.1″ _dynamic_attributes=”title,content” header_font=”New Montreal Medium|600|||||||” header_text_color=”#333333″ header_font_size=”22px” header_line_height=”1.4em” body_font=”Neue Montreal||||||||” body_font_size=”16px” body_line_height=”1.9em” text_orientation=”center” animation=”off” header_font_size_tablet=”18px” header_font_size_phone=”17px” header_font_size_last_edited=”on|desktop” body_font_size_tablet=”15px” body_font_size_phone=”17px” body_font_size_last_edited=”on|desktop” custom_css_main_element=”font-weight: 400;” border_radii_image=”on|200px|200px|200px|200px” box_shadow_style_image=”preset1″ box_shadow_vertical_image=”10px” box_shadow_blur_image=”20px” box_shadow_color_image=”rgba(0,0,0,0.1)”]@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF9hdXRob3JfYmlvIiwic2V0dGluZ3MiOnsiYmVmb3JlIjoiIiwiYWZ0ZXIiOiIifX0=@[/et_pb_blurb][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]

May 6 2021

Mom, Mum, Momma, Mommy…What?

Pastor Kim Burnell Blog, Contributor, new Mother's Day, Motherhood

“Mom, Mum, Mommy, Momma, Ma, Mom….”
“What?!”
“Hi!!”

How many moms can relate to Lois’s reaction to Stewie’s continual calling of her? That scene from “Family Guy” is funny and very familiar. I remember the frustration of trying to find five minutes of quiet during the day. One of my littles would call my name as soon as I’d lay down, or stare at me until I could feel their gaze. I’d open my eyes to a little voice asking, “Momma, are you awake?”

I am now!

It’s funny now, and I miss those eyes staring me down and the very loud voices. All our kids are adults, on their own, and Ed and I are “empty nesters.” I love this season together, but I do miss my kids being around. Time goes by so quickly, and thinking back on those years, I remember my impatience and wonder, “How much did I rush those years?”

“If only they could do it themselves instead of me always having to do it for them.” “If only they could read, then I wouldn’t have to teach them.” (side note – Stephen insists he homeschooled himself! I did a good job teaching him, right?)

And now those “if onlys” are years later, and I have what I thought I wanted: peace and quiet. I didn’t understand how much I was wishing time away, and I have learned there will be frustrations and challenges in every season of life. What matters most is my response, and more importantly, what I am teaching this next generation of mine. More often than not, I was reacting instead of responding. I was reacting from emotions, like being tired or overwhelmed, which honestly had nothing to do with them and were more about me and what I was dealing with.

We live in a world where we can access things immediately. We can microwave a meal in three minutes and the internet is available 24/7 for instant satisfaction. This instant gratification can easily bleed into every area of our life. And if not monitored, that expectation can move into our parenting where frustration builds if we fail in any way, or our children don’t meet our expectations for them.

I have learned there will be frustrations and challenges in every season of life. What matters most is my response, and more importantly, what I am teaching this next generation of mine.

When they first learned to walk, we stopped everything and recorded this lifetime moment. They took a step and they fell. Did we get frustrated? No, because they were learning. We clapped and cheered them on to do it again knowing that they would get it someday. And through the years, if we’re not careful, we can stop being encouraging and start to expect immediate results. We don’t do it intentionally; it just happens. More than likely, it comes from life struggles we’re dealing with, frustrations in what we’re going through, and even expectations of ourselves and how we see God.

Galatians 6:9 in the Message says, “so let’s not allow ourselves to get fatigued doing good. At the right time, we will harvest a good crop if we don’t give up, or quit.”

Honestly, there were times I wanted to give up. I didn’t feel adequate or good enough to be a mother. It was painful especially when our second child died at two months old. Life certainly wasn’t like I had planned. And as normal as it is to grieve, I couldn’t stay there. As a Christian, I’ve learned that life isn’t about me but about the One I reflect and represent. I was looking at what I didn’t have or how it wasn’t working out, instead of looking at what I’d been given with many more children to come. If I’d given up when it was difficult to feel or even breathe, I wouldn’t have this beautiful life with this amazing family!

I wanted it the way I had imagined it, and as good as that was, God had something better. I had to get my eyes off myself, off my pain and frustrations, to see that clearly. Life is an incredible journey with challenges along the way. They can’t be avoided. But if we don’t give up, if we keep pressing forward, if we continually look to Him with a grateful heart, we’ll see life is pretty amazing. And these kids that sometimes frustrate us and get on our last nerve? They are worth it! We’ll see them become amazing adults with great purpose that God has allowed us to be a
part in preparing them and access to front row seats on their incredible journey! I’m believing this Mother’s Day will be full of life, love, and laughter for you amidst the many, “Mom, Mum, Momma.” And for those praying for motherhood? Continue to trust God. He loves you and has good things for you. It just may not look how you pictured it but trust me, it’s even better!

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April 28 2021

On Grief and Glory

Pastor Tony Lutyk Blog, Contributor, new coping, Grief, Loss, pain

[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ custom_padding_last_edited=”on|tablet” _builder_version=”4.7.4″ _module_preset=”default” custom_margin_tablet=”0px||||false|false” custom_margin_phone=”-82px||||false|false” custom_margin_last_edited=”on|phone” custom_padding=”||12px|||” custom_padding_tablet=”0px||||false|false” custom_padding_phone=”0px||||false|false”][et_pb_row custom_padding_last_edited=”on|phone” _builder_version=”4.6.0″ _module_preset=”default” custom_padding=”0px|||||” custom_padding_tablet=”” custom_padding_phone=”|0px||0px|false|false”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.6.0″ _module_preset=”default”][et_pb_image src=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/GriefGlory.jpeg” title_text=”Hydrate” disabled_on=”off|off|on” _builder_version=”4.9.1″ _module_preset=”default” custom_padding=”||8px|||” border_radii=”on|8px|8px|8px|8px” box_shadow_style=”preset1″][/et_pb_image][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.9.1″ _module_preset=”default” text_font=”Neue Montreal||||||||” custom_padding=”||25px|||” inline_fonts=”Ogg Medium”]“I’m really good at compartmentalizing”.

That was my response to a friend who recently brought me some bad news. I had been expecting this particular piece of bad news for a few weeks at this point, but the shock of actually hearing that my fears had entered reality was something I needed to deal with.

The trouble is, I received this news on a Sunday, and Sunday is not a day that I am capable of dealing with much of anything. We all have those days, don’t we? The big days in our schedules, the moments where we have to be ready to bring our best and the pace of our schedule will not allow us to confront reality. And so, it was when I received bad news on my big day that one of the most honest things that I have ever admitted about myself to myself leaked to the surface.

I’m really good at compartmentalizing.

A younger version of me would have looked at this particular skill as a leadership strength. I don’t let bad news weigh me down, I’m strong I can handle whatever life throws at me, feelings are for people with other personality types or Enneagram numbers.

The trouble is that I have been following Jesus too long. I’ve now seen too much. I’ve experienced pain, loss, disappointment, disillusionment, grief. I’ve seen what ignored pain can do to my soul and as a pastor, I’ve seen what it can do to marriages, families, and children.

I’ve come to realize compartmentalizing is not a skill. Compartmentalizing is a trap.

What makes God good is not that God shields us from pain, it is that God redeems pain for an ultimate purpose.

There is no quicker way to get stuck in grief and pain than to ignore it. This was the conclusion of a psychologist named James Pennebaker, who ran a study in the late 1980s of the health of 60 Holocaust survivors. Pennebaker and his team interviewed the survivors about their experiences in the Nazi death camps and group the respondents into a few categories. One category he classified as “high disclosers”, meaning they were willing to talk in great detail about their experience of trauma. Another category he classified as “low disclosers”, meaning they were unwilling to discuss their experience of trauma in any detail. One year later, the study revealed that the “high disclosers” had to visit their doctor half as often as the “low disclosers”.

What this means is that our willingness to open up about our pain is directly correlated not just to our emotional and spiritual health, but to our physical health as well. Maybe James, the brother of Jesus knew what he was talking about when he wrote, “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.” (James 5:16)

I could ask the question of why we don’t do this, but the answer is obvious. It is scary to confront our pain, our grief, and our sorrow. It highlights the brokenness of our world, the brevity of life, and the misguided illusion of control so many of us cling to for our security. We fear pain, loss, grief, and death. So, it is simply easier not to look; to pretend that we can out-smart, out-work, or out-pray what is an inevitable part of the human experience. Pain, loss, and death are the consequence of our fallen sinful world, and while not every moment of pain in our lives is directly tied to a sin that we have committed, the words of our savior in John 16:33 lend us a sobering reality of life, “in this world you will have many troubles and sorrows.”

And yet it is the second half of this verse where Jesus offers us a hope that is so different from the hope we try to grab onto with our compartmentalizing. Jesus says, “But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” The hope of Jesus is not that this world will get better. It is certainly possible, but it is not guaranteed. The hope of Jesus is that he has overcome the world, he is resurrected, sitting on an un-assaulted throne in heaven, and we have the Holy Spirit alive on the inside of us right now as a deposit of the hope of glory that is our inheritance as followers of Christ.

Pain is unavoidable. God is good. Those two facts seem to be contradictory, and yet they are both true. What makes God good is not that God shields us from pain, it is that God redeems pain for an ultimate purpose. And it is why God wants more for us than compartmentalization. Because the solution to pain is purpose, and purpose makes the process worth the pain.[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.6.0″ _module_preset=”default” width_tablet=”80%” width_phone=”80%” width_last_edited=”on|tablet” max_width=”1920px” module_alignment=”center” locked=”off”][et_pb_row custom_padding_last_edited=”on|phone” _builder_version=”4.7.4″ background_color=”#ffffff” width=”100%” max_width=”1920px” custom_margin=”0px|0px|0px|0px|true|true” custom_padding=”51px|60px|51px|60px|true|true” custom_padding_tablet=”60px|40px|60px|40px|true|true” custom_padding_phone=”40px|20px|40px|20px|true|true” border_radii=”on|10px|10px|10px|10px” box_shadow_style=”preset1″ box_shadow_color=”rgba(0,0,0,0.1)” locked=”off”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.0.3″][et_pb_blurb title=”@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF9hdXRob3IiLCJzZXR0aW5ncyI6eyJiZWZvcmUiOiJCeSAiLCJhZnRlciI6IiIsIm5hbWVfZm9ybWF0IjoiZGlzcGxheV9uYW1lIiwibGluayI6Im9mZiIsImxpbmtfZGVzdGluYXRpb24iOiJhdXRob3JfYXJjaGl2ZSJ9fQ==@” image=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/TonyLutyk2.png” image_max_width=”150px” content_max_width=”860px” image_tablet=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/joshbairdblog.png” image_phone=”https://welovechurch.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/ShawnBaird2.png” image_last_edited=”off|tablet” image_max_width_tablet=”150px” image_max_width_phone=”150px” image_max_width_last_edited=”on|tablet” _builder_version=”4.9.1″ _dynamic_attributes=”title,content” header_font=”New Montreal Medium|600|||||||” header_text_color=”#333333″ header_font_size=”22px” header_line_height=”1.4em” body_font=”Neue Montreal||||||||” body_font_size=”16px” body_line_height=”1.9em” text_orientation=”center” animation=”off” header_font_size_tablet=”18px” header_font_size_phone=”17px” header_font_size_last_edited=”on|desktop” body_font_size_tablet=”15px” body_font_size_phone=”17px” body_font_size_last_edited=”on|desktop” custom_css_main_element=”font-weight: 400;” border_radii_image=”on|200px|200px|200px|200px” box_shadow_style_image=”preset1″ box_shadow_vertical_image=”10px” box_shadow_blur_image=”20px” box_shadow_color_image=”rgba(0,0,0,0.1)”]@ET-DC@eyJkeW5hbWljIjp0cnVlLCJjb250ZW50IjoicG9zdF9hdXRob3JfYmlvIiwic2V0dGluZ3MiOnsiYmVmb3JlIjoiIiwiYWZ0ZXIiOiIifX0=@[/et_pb_blurb][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]